PDA

View Full Version : Cheating


Seyluv
12-21-2006, 04:48 PM
Is it right to cheat on someone you is in a relionship? Have you ever done this? Would you ever cheat?

For me I believe it is wrong to cheat on someone. I will never do this act or will ever plan to do such a thing.

John Smith
12-21-2006, 04:53 PM
No, no and no :)

I'll forever hate who does it.

Seyluv
12-21-2006, 04:55 PM
Right now two of my classmates are talking about how they cheat on their girls and how everyone is doing it. Which help me create this topic.

I strongly am against cheating, I mean why would I do that to someone.

Staircase
12-21-2006, 05:26 PM
No, no and no :)

I'll forever hate who does it.

My exact thoughts...

It isn't true love if you are tempted to be with another woman, so why stay with the person you are cheating on in the first place?

Kiera
12-21-2006, 06:07 PM
Well I know its something most of you all do not like, I do not like it either its horrible. But the thing is, if the person you are dating before marriage, if they cheat on you, no one is to tell them not to. They make their own choices and if they do cheat on you and try to cry back in your arms to have both of you, to either leech off of what you ahve or just like to play games, that is their choice. Plus if they do that, its also not right to hate them for it, they are not the person for you. Even though you thought they were. Now if they were married to you, that is a different story.

Avathar
12-21-2006, 07:00 PM
No, NO, NO!

Cheating is never good, in my opinion, even if it's cheating for a good reason, or for good intention, or if the significant doesn't figure it out, it all would just come down to failure in trust, no matter what.

Kat
12-21-2006, 07:33 PM
No, NO, NO!

Cheating is never good, in my opinion, even if it's cheating for a good reason, or for good intention, or if the significant doesn't figure it out, it all would just come down to failure in trust, no matter what.quoted for the truth ^-^

John Smith
12-21-2006, 09:02 PM
No, NO, NO!

Cheating is never good, in my opinion, even if it's cheating for a good reason, or for good intention, or if the significant doesn't figure it out, it all would just come down to failure in trust, no matter what.

I wouldn't have said it better myself :)

BTW, Kiera, if you had a boyfriend and he was cheating on you, how would you feel?

Seyluv
12-21-2006, 09:18 PM
One ogf my best friends was cheating on her boyfriend with two other guys and then it caught up with her. She was to get married to this guy and he cheated on her two times in a row. One time in her very owned bed. I believe that if you do something it will come back on you. I treat everyone I know with the same respect they give me.

Phoenix Flame
12-22-2006, 09:17 AM
Ok,...time to own up. Maybe someone will learn something from my experience. Last year I cheated on my gf. It did not come to sex...but might as well have because that's how she felt. She has always had a difficult time with trust and to do something like that to her was trust shattering. I believe what Avathar said about not doing it even for the 'right' reasons. It may seem right to you at the time, (for me it felt right because of anger, misunderstandings and insecurity) but you will inevitably ruin everything...your self-respect, self-image and feelings of self-worth. It really sucks. I eventually came clean because I really did/do love my gf and wanted to put it all behind me. I hoped that we could work things out and for a short while (a week or so) it worked. Afterwards, though, she couldn't handle it anymore and broke it off with me. I was devastated. I went from thinking she was the one, to unsure and confused (cheating) to being 100% sure, to losing her...I thought for good. However, after about 3 months of silence, she called me one day because her good friend AND grandmother passed in the same week - and she needed someone to talk to. I was there for her and we've been rebuilding trust ever since. It's been a long, difficult journey: but very worth it. I love her and know that there is nothing that will ever tear me away from her like that again...I would even understand it if she decided to cheat on me (for similar reasons or for revenge or just because.) No one deserves what I did to her. Every day I wake up I remind myself of it ~ because I don't want to repeat the past. I mostly use it as a rear-view mirror, but every once in a while she will be insecure and ask me again how she can be sure I'll ALWAYS be there for her, and "I just know" doesn't cut it...you know? I know because I would rather die/kill myself than lose her again. I know because I'm writing this post now. I know because she is my Sun - the center of my universe. I know because EVERY SINGLE DAY WE WERE APART I thought of her and missed her and longed for her. She is my ewe lamb. My partner and my lifesaver.

So, er...John; do you forever hate me?

John Smith
12-22-2006, 02:57 PM
Yeah :mad:

If she forgived you, it's her bussiness, but I don't understand why you cheated on her if you loved her that much.

Afterwards, though, she couldn't handle it anymore and broke it off with me. I was devastated.

And she did a very good thing.

However, after about 3 months of silence, she called me one day because her good friend AND grandmother passed in the same week

My feelings :(

Spec Highwind
12-22-2006, 03:03 PM
One of my best friends is always cheating on his girlfriend... And I hate that... If he hadn't gone to Switzerland I would make him tell her the truth... or else I would tell her myself.

So, my answer is no. Definitely not. And it is the worst thing someone could ever do to me.

Staircase
12-22-2006, 07:52 PM
So, er...John; do you forever hate me?

There is a big difference between those who cheat and realize what they have done, and those who cheat and continue to do it. I will forever hate those who cheat and do not see the wrong in it. It is as if they do not care about anyone else's feelings at all.

Obviously it was a bad idea for you to cheat on your girlfriend, but you also realize your mistake.

John Smith
12-22-2006, 08:01 PM
Still, he has done it and nothing can happen that erases that. Nothng can happen to make so that it had never happened. Nothing can take it out of their memories (Except amnesia, but that's another thing >_>).

Yes, it's a good thing that he realised what he had done and that what he did was wrong. It's a good thing that he feels bad about it. It's a good thing that he bares in mind the horrible thing that he did to his girlfriend.

If she forgived you, who am I to judge you?

By the way, you two are back again, aren't you?

Phoenix Flame
12-23-2006, 01:00 AM
Yes. We are together. And thank you Staircase for your point of view. I have definitely grown to appreciate all that has happened, for it has made us stronger as individuals, as well as a couple.

Yes Smith, you are right: nothing can ever erase that from our memories, but God (with the help of time) can heal a lot of wounds and make lemonade out of the most sour of lemons.

BTW: You are still my favorite wizazard :D

Doctor
12-24-2006, 05:23 AM
People who cheat are despicable. If I ever did something like that, I couldn't live with myself.

However, a person's sexual desires can drive them away from their partner if their partner refuses to have sex with them, or just doesn't feel like it. And often times, cheating is just a way to get revenge on their partner if he/she made them angry or did something they thought was wrong. Or the cheating of a partner could be done out of spite (also to get back at another person, etc.)

There are many reasons for cheating; too many to count, but my opinion is that no matter the reason, if you cheat, then you're doing a most horrid thing. Someone who cheats does not really deserve a partner, especially if that's all they want to do is cheat on them.

I have mixed feelings....But I know it's wrong.

Yggdrasill
12-24-2006, 09:00 PM
I think cheating in a relationship is horrible.
If you're in a relationship with someone and you love them and their cheating on you it just shows they have no feelings towards you. Personally I think that if someone is cheating they should just tell the person their in a relationship with instead of doing it in secret. If they aren't happy with the person their currently with they should admit it to that person so they can at least move-on with their lives.

Staircase
12-24-2006, 10:30 PM
I have noticed something quite interesting... everybody here is younger than 20 except Reason who admitted to cheating. And I'm guessing a lot of us haven't had more than 3 girlfriends in our entire lives. Now i am in no way saying that cheating is right, but this may be a topic where opinions change over time. None of us know the pressures that are on us in a real relationship (not a high school crush). So it may be much more difficult than a lot of us think.

Arkacia
12-25-2006, 12:11 AM
I'm over 20, and don't believe there is any excuse for cheating on someone whom you profess to love and who trusts you. It is really the ultimate betrayal. This is serious relationships though. The teen tryout type things will involve cheating because those involved are young and learning how to handle relationships. Some young people learn faster and better than others. Immature boys, and girls, bouncing from one partner to the other rarely take the time to consider what their actions have on those they leave behind. While that isn't nice to the person hurt, it is part of the learning process and we've all been through it.

After leaving the teen years behind, I've never cheated on any guy I've been in a relationship with, but was cheated on once (that I know of), and immediatly dropped the guy like a hot brick when I found out. The anger and hurt was immense.

Really, once things cool to the point where eyes and thoughts start wandering, then it is time to pull the plug on the relationship. The hurt from breaking up is bad enough, but the hurt from a partner cheating is a 1000 times worse.

Glad to hear Reason realised what he'd done, and is now trying to repair the damage. Be aware though, that your girl will never totally trust you again, there will always be that speck of doubt in the back of her mind. This is the sort of betrayal that will never totally go away. I wish you luck rebuilding the relationship though, seems that old saying is true, you truly don't know what you have, until it is gone.

Seyluv
12-25-2006, 04:41 PM
Hurting someone in their herat is far more worser than anything I can think of. It kinda changes a person too.

Kat
12-25-2006, 11:48 PM
Hurting someone in their herat is far more worser than anything I can think of. It kinda changes a person too.Lol,yea i've been cheated on twice in my life and i've definatly changed since.

Seyluv
12-26-2006, 01:00 AM
I really haven't been cheated on, but I still know how bad it can be.

Zeon
12-26-2006, 06:29 AM
cheating is wrong i agree with all of you that the factor tht if your in a relationship with someone else and your temped by another then you should talk with them about it. try and figure out whats driving you into wanting someone else. i myself did this. my ex-gf moved away and it was a hard relationship even before then. i was always working/at college and she was just out and about with her parents and working hard at school (i 1st year col she was yr 11 skl) and then i met someone at college whos just perfect for me. we have so much in common. well.....i obviously wasnt gunna cheat on her. she was miles away and tht would have just drven me mad with guilt. so i called her up tht night and said about this girl. and we agreed tht the distance and tht we wouldnt see each other often enough was too much and so we broke off. me and the girl from college got together and are very happy :D. i didnt need to cheat to make myself feel loved by another. practically everything can be sorted with words and becoz of this i believe tht cheating is unnessasary and wrong and therefore pointlessly stupid. for those who do it, shame upon you. (im not having a go at you Reasoniamalive...as you've been there and learned from it.) and for those of you still out there who are considering it.....not tht there should be......try telling either the person your in the relationship with or if you dont think she could handle it a very close friend and ask for advice from them. if they really are your friend then they'll help you make the right decision for you. But just dont CHEAT!!!!!!! so yer.....thts wat i have to say. cheating = wrong.

ive never been cheated on (tht im awre of) but im sure tht im not tht great so someones bound to have done it to me. but im happy with my new girlfriend and i really couldnt care. i do have sympathy to those who have been cheated on and i honestly cant imagine what it feels like but i hope tht we all learn somethign from it and start to progress in this world to making the right choices.

Phoenix Flame
12-26-2006, 12:02 PM
Thank you Arkacia and Zeon for your thoughts and honesty. I agree w/you that it is immaturity behind it because I was very immature for my age. My background had a lot to do w/that (although I am not blaming my selfishness/immaturity on that.) In the end, it just comes down to common sense, or selfishness. You know what you should do, but you let the 'dark side' win. Zeon makes a very good point that talking things over almost always has a better outcome than cheating. Far less (if any) guilt associated with talking also.

Spec Highwind
12-26-2006, 12:47 PM
It's good to see that we all think the same way. 10-0

Zeon
12-26-2006, 02:18 PM
its great to see also so many different veiws about why cheatings wrong too. makes you wonder just how deep human emotions really go. and its great to see we can share the same opinions no matter what :)

Cloud101
01-12-2007, 05:29 PM
I would never hurt my little Tessa, I would die for her, I would wait an eternity for her, she makes me so happy, and I her. We're perfect for each other, I'll never cheat on her!

Phoenix Flame
01-13-2007, 12:27 PM
^ Sigh... :rolleyes:

Hydra
01-14-2007, 09:57 PM
Haha, I've cheated before.

Actually, it's nothing to laugh about. It's actually quite saddening. Cheating, or "seeing other people", can mean different things to different people. I've only cheated once, and that was when I wasn't satisified with my relationship, but I cared too much for my girlfriend's feelings to break it off with her. So, I decided to cheat on her. It felt wrong, horrible, and dispicable the first time I kissed another woman other than her while dating. o_O But y'know what? I liked it. I actually felt that our relationship could go somewhere.

That's why I cheated. I just wasn't happy, and I at least cared for my other. Hell, I even told her. I had that giant hole in my stomach(the butterfly feeling, lol.) for a few weeks, but I eventually got over it. Live, love, and learn. If you feel your relationship isn't going anywhere, and you don't want to break it off because you care for her, then go ahead and cheat.

The only wrong thing to do is cheat for a long time without telling your other. Now that's something I'd NEVER do. I told Ashley (that ex I was referring to as "her" in the first paragraph XD) that I was cheating on her in the first few weeks of doing it. You can't live with yourself if you do turn your back on your lover for another, without even giving her the slightest insight.

So, cheating is alright. It's not the most smart way to deal with a bad relationship. Sure, sex and needs also play into the role, but if you're actually serious about a relationship, then cheating isn't so bad. You just have to be truthful, and ready to face whatever comes your way. You may have broken her heart, but at least you didn't lie to her. For that, she'll give you the least bit of respect, but it's something. It's better than losing a lover, then a friend in the same process. XD

Phoenix Flame
01-14-2007, 10:43 PM
I totally disagree w/you Hydra... but that's because I've been there. If you are a 'friend' wouldn't you talk about how you are unhappy and stuff before cheating---> or say "I think we should see other people" or "I feel unhappy and want to experiment w/someone else" or something...anything!? Just not do it first and hide it ---> no matter if it's a day, a week, or a year! I was so stupid/naive/immature and I know that; but you live and you learn.

Anyway, that's how I feel. I've definitely learned more about myself and 'us' from the experience...but never would want to repeat it!
~fin~

Hydra
01-14-2007, 10:57 PM
You can disagree with me. That's fine. XD

I told her how I felt beforehand, but I had yet to see if our relationship was progressing, while at the same time trying to rekindle myself by talking it out and being with someone else. That's my view on it. If you do make that decision without thinking twice, you might end up in the same situation you were in in the first place.

Phoenix Flame
02-02-2007, 06:50 AM
Update: Well,..<sigh> things aren't working out between Susie and I and I'm tired of changing every area of my life to simply 'co-exist.' She (obviously) has a difficult time trusting me (or anyone for that matter.) I realized today though that I changed a LOT of my views/perceptions and sacrificed a lot for her, but in return I didn't really see that much. Maybe some time apart is best now...for both of us. I feel liberated <no, I didn't burn her bras or anything> XD and I think that things are going to be ok...instead of obsessing over it, I feel at peace, so I guess it was 'right.' Anyway, just thought I'd give you guys/gals an update cause I don't want to misrepresent. :D

Cloud101
02-02-2007, 12:55 PM
We're here for you man...

white mage
02-02-2007, 04:09 PM
My exact thoughts...

It isn't true love if you are tempted to be with another woman, so why stay with the person you are cheating on in the first place?

Good question.

Phoenix Flame
02-03-2007, 03:07 AM
Going to 'talk' about things tomorrow (Saturday) afternoon...let ya know how things go ;)

Cloud101
02-03-2007, 12:26 PM
Good luck...:D

Hydra
02-03-2007, 09:55 PM
Going to 'talk' about things tomorrow (Saturday) afternoon...let ya know how things go ;)
You can do it!

=D

Seriously though, good luck in that. We'll ALL be wishing you the best of it.

Yggdrasill
02-03-2007, 10:02 PM
Devoting your whole life to someone and then finding out they secretly hate you or just plain don't like you has got to be pretty horrible. :/

blackstar
02-08-2007, 11:31 AM
"Cheating" I can understand the whole ordeal as ive been on both sides of cheating it was bad it hurt both of us. But we worked it out addmited our wrongs are still together and stronger than we have ever been, (i wouldnt recomend it as a way to strengthen relationships) so thats my statement.

Phoenix Flame
02-15-2007, 08:48 AM
You can do it!

=D

Seriously though, good luck in that. We'll ALL be wishing you the best of it.


Meh...I did it. Noes ballons falling from teh ceiling or anything yet tho.

Still waiting to see what's gonna happen.

Phoenix Flame
03-05-2007, 04:31 AM
Final update:

Well, Susie and I FINALLY called it quits ---> 4 years!

I got tired of being on a leash... 0_0 YaRLY!

And I gave her the shock collar back too XD!

Seriously: I've learned SOOOOOOOOO much! I've become a better person through it all; but all-in-all I'm actually relieved. We are going to TRY to be friends. We go to the same church, know a lot of the same peeps...etc. Umm... not sure what else to write here folks.

One things for sure though: don't feel sorry for meh! XD

Reasoniamalive = fresh meat! J/K J/K!!! LOL!

Slider
03-05-2007, 08:27 AM
Lol! Whoever said anything bout feelin sorry for ya

You're a good friend so I feel sorry for her for losin ya ;)

(No, this post is an exception because i'm not kidding in it)

Phoenix Flame
03-05-2007, 11:52 AM
:) TY Slider

Hydra
03-05-2007, 06:21 PM
Final update:

Well, Susie and I FINALLY called it quits ---> 4 years!

I got tired of being on a leash... 0_0 YaRLY!

And I gave her the shock collar back too XD!

Seriously: I've learned SOOOOOOOOO much! I've become a better person through it all; but all-in-all I'm actually relieved. We are going to TRY to be friends. We go to the same church, know a lot of the same peeps...etc. Umm... not sure what else to write here folks.

One things for sure though: don't feel sorry for meh! XD

Reasoniamalive = fresh meat! J/K J/K!!! LOL!
XD

Well, live and learn. I'm glad you made the decision you felt was best. ^^;

And, whoa, we have fresh mod meat on the forum. Who wants it? XD

Cloud101
03-05-2007, 06:54 PM
Sure, I'll take it, and, Reason, we're all proud of you, I bet it was a hard choice to make...

blackstar
03-06-2007, 11:19 AM
Sure, I'll take it, and, Reason, we're all proud of you, I bet it was a hard choice to make...
I think he was talking to the ladies Cloud...LOL

Phoenix Flame
03-06-2007, 06:04 PM
I think he was talking to the ladies Cloud...LOL

Thanks Blackstar... I was getting a little worried there for a sec... although it could have gone either way the way Hydra was talking XD

blackstar
03-07-2007, 11:05 AM
Well i mean if i had said what Cloud said that would be expected but Cloud isnt that way (at least thats what he says....) LOL >^_^<

Hydra
03-07-2007, 06:51 PM
Thanks Blackstar... I was getting a little worried there for a sec... although it could have gone either way the way Hydra was talking XD
z0mg wha?

I'm loyal! XD

Phoenix Flame
03-08-2007, 08:29 AM
z0mg wha?

I'm loyal! XD

hmm...

'nough said.

Hydra
03-08-2007, 09:27 AM
Whoas there, taking my interest already? O_o

Gackt Camui
05-03-2007, 12:31 PM
Thats you reason? lol. You remind me of somebody but I just can't think of who right now. lol

Phoenix Flame
05-04-2007, 05:13 AM
Yup... that's me w/o any of my l33t facial hair. >_< lolz0rz.


I'm going to grow an even l33t3r beardz0rz JUST for Hydra in July...That is if we're still on buddy...?

Oh yeah - and cheating is the bad...reason says "Don't do it" XD 4 real.

forever yours
05-04-2007, 05:03 PM
no, no, NO!!!!! if u cheat, then i'll hate u forever... so be warned!

Fawkes Lament
05-04-2007, 07:16 PM
Final update:

Well, Susie and I FINALLY called it quits ---> 4 years!

I got tired of being on a leash... 0_0 YaRLY!

And I gave her the shock collar back too XD!

Seriously: I've learned SOOOOOOOOO much! I've become a better person through it all; but all-in-all I'm actually relieved. We are going to TRY to be friends. We go to the same church, know a lot of the same peeps...etc. Umm... not sure what else to write here folks.

One things for sure though: don't feel sorry for meh! XD

Reasoniamalive = fresh meat! J/K J/K!!! LOL!

You SOO stole that from Real World

Anyway, it is indefinitely and infinitely wrong to cheat on someone. If you are dating a person, then that would mean that you love them/strongly like them. It is completely wrong to just throw those feelings away, AND lie about it (Sometimes, it's not exactly lying, but still...). I would hate it if anyone did that to me, and I would never do something that horrid to someone else.

Thanks for reading this long thing!

Gackt Camui
05-04-2007, 07:44 PM
I would never do that to somebody either. And just like you, I am sure if we really care for somebody we wouldn't want that to happen to us either.

Fawkes Lament
05-05-2007, 02:35 PM
I'm sure that most people share the same opinion. I mean, look at the poll results!

Phoenix Flame
05-06-2007, 06:24 AM
no, no, NO!!!!! if u cheat, then i'll hate u forever... so be warned!

;yik

:eek:

;ouc

:(

;hea

;cen

;dep

;oop

;doh

;brn

;lub

Luis
05-06-2007, 10:01 AM
Definitely it's not right.
Whether you do it or not, it's a completely different matter. But being fair, it is not right.

Gackt Camui
05-07-2007, 04:19 PM
Yeah but we all seem to have the same opinion.

Darkreno
09-22-2007, 04:46 PM
CHEATING SUCKS & I WISH I NEVER DID IT.... *cries* omg i never thought i'd come here . but this is all my fault...i made a huge mistake early this year and slept with another woman. that woman decided to tell marius. and now she made the same mistake i did & slept with her baby daddy.......man thats not the part i think really made her do it...its the fact that it was the same woman who destroyed her relationship with her baby daddy in the first place..i don kno what to do i don't wanna lose her. i got so mad when she told me everything . now i think she's scared of me. wtf do i do? :( this all jacked up.

Phoenix Flame
09-23-2007, 07:42 AM
Judging by what you've both written so far in the other thread, it would seem like you both regret what you did - and that's good! It means you both can begin to put the past behind you and focus on building your futures. The road will be long/bumpy but well-worth it.

Darkreno
11-03-2007, 10:51 PM
thanks reason it rly is a tough time on us at the time if its not one thing its another. im gonna do the best i know how...

Bonesplitter
02-04-2008, 05:41 PM
i cant stand cheating
or seeing other people cheat

blackstar i think you know of the person im about to speak about but you cant say ANYTHING(its not sam)

i live with my sister and two step-sisters
one of the step-sister is an all out ho
everywhere she goes...well i cant say it, they'll block it
but her and this guy are "thinking about" ""SEEING"(F) each other
and the guy has a girl-friend and my step-sister knows he has a girl-friend
...its makes me so mad

i just cant stand cheating or cheaters

_XxRikuxX_
05-13-2008, 02:42 PM
that doesnt change the subject..we all cheat either is phisically or in toughts..no one is a saint...who never had is fantasies when it with your boyfriend/girlfriend..and suddenly you see a godly image of the perfect girl/boy...well that happens to everyone..im against cheating..but you have to see te other side sometimes people cheat not by pleasure..but for needing...To Get the attention, respect and respect from your love... thats an example..im talking by experience..and because i have sometimes discuss that Opnely with a group of some friends..Guys and girls..in the end..Each one has in own way of thinking..i have never cheated.but who knows.....Never say never..Dont Fool the others with lies..because in the end your just fooling yourself..and angels are in the sky..none of us is one angel...

Now taking the jokes apart im talking seriously

Dhruv
05-13-2008, 05:15 PM
Yes, its ok as long as you dont get caught or it's with someone you dont want to spend the rest of your life with.

Spec Highwind
05-13-2008, 05:31 PM
that doesnt change the subject..we all cheat either is phisically or in toughts..no one is a saint...who never had is fantasies when it with your boyfriend/girlfriend..and suddenly you see a godly image of the perfect girl/boy...

Well, that doesn't apply to me!

Kat
05-13-2008, 07:23 PM
yes, its ok as long as you dont get caught or it's with someone you dont want to spend the rest of your life with.
You're a retard.
I'm sorry.
But that's ridiculous.
I don't know what goes on in your mind, and I'm not sure I wanna, but I've never heard anyone just come out and say that before.
No, it's not okay.
It's not okay if you don't get caught.
There's no point to cheating on someone.
If they don't satisfy you enough that you want to cheat on them, then why would you date them in the first place?

_XxRikuxX_
05-14-2008, 12:27 PM
Im not 100% agreed With u Dhruv...Well However i dont Really see the needing of cheating someone..But i understand why people do it...

Oh and Dhruv Ignore Kat...She is like that....

She doesn't understand that each one as different oppinion and point of view..and we live in a free country..so kat if He/She thinks like that..thats just his/her opinion

Dhruv
05-14-2008, 12:53 PM
You're a retard.
I'm sorry.
But that's ridiculous.
I don't know what goes on in your mind, and I'm not sure I wanna, but I've never heard anyone just come out and say that before.
No, it's not okay.
It's not okay if you don't get caught.
There's no point to cheating on someone.
If they don't satisfy you enough that you want to cheat on them, then why would you date them in the first place?

I'm a retard because i have a valid option?

Maybe because I'm more relationlyship aware?
Maybe I'm more sociably acceptable?

I'm 16, its not like i;m going to get married.

I'm going to enjoy life as much as i can.

_XxRikuxX_
05-14-2008, 01:24 PM
Just Like i said..Ignore her..she is childish..
She can't accept the fact that Everyone thinkd different than her..

The First Time I post a thread she Told me something like that..I Simply ignored her..like she wasn't even there.....

Spec Highwind
05-14-2008, 01:31 PM
Just Like i said..Ignore her..she is childish..


She's not really childish, and I can say she speaks in a much more mature way since I met her like one year ago or something.

I totally agree with her.

Leon
05-14-2008, 01:39 PM
Actually although i dont support your oppinion i'm actually impressed by it.

and nevermind that, kat can be a little edgy sometimes but i'm sure she doesnt really mean it ;)

i wouldnt go as far as callin her emo 0.0"

she would KILL me ~.~


EDIT: wha? i missed riku's posts!

ok that just upset me >.<

and how mature would u call urself if u start labeling others with names without giving them a chance?

JFTR Riku until i found out kat's pic and age i used to think she was twice her current age, in fact she's one of the most mature people of her age and i would go as far as saying a LOT more mature than many others much older than her or me. so callin her childish is out of the question; and u can see that it's not just my oppinion but most of the forum at least will agree with me. For starters she has more than 10k posts of which i haven't seen any which were spammy or immature; unlike some i know who post spam in almost everyone of their posts.
an to be honest, i used to think Dhruv was a bot at first because of his/her unusual name, opinion and number of posts.

So play nice and no name tagging :)
A small nudge would do, because otherwise me or spec would have tagged u with a name (just like u did with her or she did with Dhurv) and someone in your defence will tag us with a name and it would all turn into a big useless fight

now lets quietly close this issue (kat-dhurv; riku-kat)
and discuss dhurv's oppinion instead, i find it intresting that s/he's thinking this way

_XxRikuxX_
05-14-2008, 01:43 PM
Look its not about agreed or not agreed..its the way of treating the person..Im not going to call a guy retard just because he doesn't like chocolate...Whatever im against it and think thats pure childish...But i give her a lil' dicount 14 years...

Spec Highwind
05-14-2008, 02:05 PM
unlike some i know who post spam in almost everyone of their posts.

:(

_XxRikuxX_
05-14-2008, 02:24 PM
And makes yout hink im afraid of you to??
hmhmhmh

Well whatever she started with me yet..so check ou my threads and see her opinion and see if its quite right...AND Besides who da hell she thinks she his??
You know what? like i said im not even there for her...so anything she says is pure dust to me....Hmm As about u 2? this is between me and her kay??

And I didn't called nick names..its my opinion..if she doesn't like..then she should stop giving her opinion about the others...Especially the ones she doesn't know a thing about...So if you think everything is clean water..think again..she apologizes i do the same...otherwise i dont even speak....Oww and the last thing...everyone taked the "jokes i say" ok..she is the only one who thinks wrong...Im not going to waste my time arguing...

Leon
05-14-2008, 02:28 PM
:(

NO it's not u u big silly :)

it's not even someone on this forum -.0

EDIT: @ Riku

i think u should reread ur post and imagine it was directed @ u

maybe u'll get my point, or maybe not ;)

Spec Highwind
05-14-2008, 03:39 PM
AND Besides who da hell she thinks she his??

Huh... the most important user in FFNet?

Leon
05-14-2008, 04:34 PM
*sigh* he didn't get my point >.>

She only said retard then apologized in the next line of the same danged post

u wanna make it the issue of ur life? we don't

if u have a problem with her then put her on ur ignore list and enough.

to be honest i dont wanna hear about it, just be mature enough to follow my hint in my previous post, i dont have to reapeat thousands of times to get through to u, maybe some bolding and colors will help:

now lets quietly close this issue (kat-dhurv; riku-kat)
and discuss dhurv's oppinion instead, i find it intresting that s/he's thinking this way

Spec Highwind
05-14-2008, 05:22 PM
We all now who needs to grow a lot here ;)

At least we know who should take a different attitude as a member.

EDIT: Oh, and... let's call it a discussion, shall we? We're ruining the thread.

_XxRikuxX_
05-15-2008, 12:19 PM
why dont u just shut up leon? So your saying im the imature?? hmm however you dont say it with a straight face..i guess that makes you a coward! how is that???

ANd...

like i said im going to ignore her..So your repeating yourself...over and over

Dhruv
05-15-2008, 02:12 PM
I like discussions/argument :D

_XxRikuxX_
05-15-2008, 02:26 PM
so help me one in this one..you are on my side right?? lets form an anti-old members team..we are the newest guys here so lets beat tha hell out of the old guys...lol

Spec Highwind
05-15-2008, 03:33 PM
Yeah, sure.

Leon
05-15-2008, 04:19 PM
why dont u just shut up leon? So your saying im the imature?? hmm however you dont say it with a straight face..i guess that makes you a coward! how is that???

ANd...

like i said im going to ignore her..So your repeating yourself...over and over

u're startin to cross ur line mr. internet-tough-guy :rolleyes:

n i m unimpressed by ur superb talent of nitty-pickin fights with anyone -.-

Bonesplitter
05-15-2008, 04:41 PM
so help me one in this one..you are on my side right?? lets form an anti-old members team..we are the newest guys here so lets beat tha hell out of the old guys...lol

so your going to beat the hell out of us old guys...well i waiting

and kat is one of my best friends, and just because she has an opion thats differnt than yours dosent mean she cant say it. and you saying its ok to cheat...what the hell man. thats the lowest thing anyone could do to someone. if you want to be with someone else just leave the peson your with, insted of cheat on them. im 17 and i know what im talking about
ask blackstar.

is it just me or do these new memebers think there balls are bigger than ours?

Spec Highwind
05-15-2008, 04:53 PM
It would be nice to have veteran members like Reason, the 1337 (who's still around, I always think of him as "Reason" or "John" instead of "Phoenix" :)), Hydra, the 1337, Avathar, the 1337, or even Zeromus, the 1337 in this discussion!

Kat
05-15-2008, 06:07 PM
Okay.
This thread was made for discussing the topic "cheating" not ""oh my god, lets start fights".
This is a debate and that means all sorts of different opinions are going to be expressed, but that does NOT mean that we have to shove our opinions down other people's throats.

So Druhv & Riku - I'm sorry if I offended anyone, I'm not really use to people getting mad over me calling them "retards" it's part of my everyday vocabulary, sorry, again.

Let's try to get back on topic and stop yelling at each other, ok?

Spec Highwind
05-18-2008, 05:07 PM
Last off-topic:

I forgot Luis, the 1337! O.O

Dhruv
05-19-2008, 06:38 AM
so help me one in this one..you are on my side right?? lets form an anti-old members team..we are the newest guys here so lets beat tha hell out of the old guys...lol

I'm down lol.

blackstar
05-19-2008, 07:29 PM
ask blackstar.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure we have both had our fill of this one. *sighs*

Dhruv
05-20-2008, 10:06 AM
Anyone cheated before?

blackstar
05-20-2008, 02:53 PM
Honestly I can say no to that.

Kat
05-20-2008, 08:21 PM
I haven't..
Lets see if I get my butt chewed off for my opinion again.
x_x

Leon
05-21-2008, 03:16 AM
*picks up a broom n stands back to back with kat*

there'll be NO butt chewin today,

coz i too never cheated

Phoenix Flame
05-21-2008, 04:10 AM
Less spam...more good, clean, cheatin fun. <3


...er, NVM xD

Kat
05-21-2008, 08:08 AM
JOHN.
O_O

xD

*picks up a mop while standing behind Leon*

o.o

Phoenix Flame
05-22-2008, 04:30 AM
SRSLY guys/gal...let's keep the spam in spamtastic where it belongs. Thanks.

Leon
05-22-2008, 09:36 AM
*brushes john's mouth with broom*

n keep that mouth clean!

there is absolutely no reason nor excuse to cheat on someone, especially on emotional issues where the damage is more painful than any other physical one.

besides, cheating is bad in anything. the worst case would be cheating others' emotions

from here on cheaters will be brushed, mopped... or just plainly whacked with the stick side 0.0

Kat
05-22-2008, 08:52 PM
*brushes john's mouth with broom*

n keep that mouth clean!

there is absolutely no reason nor excuse to cheat on someone, especially on emotional issues where the damage is more painful than any other physical one.

besides, cheating is bad in anything. the worst case would be cheating others' emotions

from here on cheaters will be brushed, mopped... or just plainly whacked with the stick side 0.0
<3


Leon is right, IMO.
Most people who cheat don't think about how their partner's feelings would be, like...they don't think about the consequence.
People who live off cheating are living off of and getting their kicks from hurting others..
And I think that's wrong.

If the person you're with, isn't enough, why wouldn't you leave them?
Would you be afraid to live without them?
Or afraid you would hurt them if you left?
That part always confuses me.
-.-

Phoenix Flame
05-23-2008, 03:49 AM
Did I already answer those questions Kat? Back when I admitted I cheated on my ex? 0.o I think if you re-read my posts you'd see just how confused I was. I remember being very upset also at the time...not that that excuses my behavior.

...more on this topic later. >_>

Kat
05-23-2008, 03:29 PM
Well, since you last posted about that like 5 million years ago, and exactly 44209000092000k weeks ago..

No I haven't read them.
-_-

Phoenix Flame
05-24-2008, 04:49 AM
XDD;

It was only 1 1/2 years back. ;p

I'll drudge up the past another night...not into thinking about it again at the present 'mo.

Doctor
05-26-2008, 04:23 AM
Cheating...

Most think that cheating is a despicable act that should never be committed. But people cheat anyway, even though they realize what they're doing, the consequences of their spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend finding out, etc. Why? Why do we commit most of our oh-so horrible acts of whatever the hell they are anyway?

It's because we're all human. You can't be perfect. Cheating on someone, especially someone very close to you IS a terrible thing to do, and it's not like you're ASLEEP while you're doing it, you're quite consious and aware. But a huge part of being a human being is doing very, very STUPID things. Sure, we may regret it forever or for however long it takes us to forgive ourselves for doing something stupid, but that's the thing; if we can't forgive ourselves first, how can we expect anyone else to forgive us as well? How can we at least learn from what we've done?

And yes, some people DON'T regret doing horribly stupid things. But you have to forgive them anyway, because we're ALL HUMAN, AND WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES. My very point being, we shouldn't make out our mistakes to be as unsightly and as anger-inducing as they seem to be.

I've been cheated on before myself. And after four months, I'm STILL angry about it. But I'm not going as far as to say, "He's a f'in bastard who did this JUST so that he could hurt me, blah blah blah." I have forgiven him. And I doubt that I'll stay angry forever.

And for those of you who are still thinking, "Cheaters are f'in SCUM AND THEY ALL SHOULD JUST ROT IN A DITCH AND RAWR RAWR RAWR," think about this instead; "I pity those people for being so damn stupid. I pity them for not being able to LEARN after making such a bad mistake."

Leon
05-26-2008, 06:03 AM
GOD!


i dont know u but i dont need a sign from the skies to tell me that u're an american n i swear to kick myself in the balls if u werent! (not that im holding a grudge in particular against u or them or anything at all)

one of the things i despise most in my life is stereotypical stuff (again, strictly nothing personnal against u or anyone else in the world)

and that is the one of most stereotypical and redundant excuses -based on the always growing and decieving propaganda- that i ever hear from anyone!


Stereotype:
We're only humans :

Case: The ever-typical excuse u get from any wrong commiter ranging from those who forgot to wash their teeth to baby rapers.

Reply: Yes we ARE humans, but u dont see us killin ppl n sayin we'r only human, we dont go around blowin kids' heads off with a shotgun n go sayin we'r only human. as far as i see it, that excuse could only work for animals n such per say that their brain isnt as functionnal as ours to be responsible for their actions till a certain limit (i only bolded this so show that im not an extremist and agree that we're responsible for our actions til a certain limit, love cheating IS in these limits since it's not a small error or an involuntary instinct). So NO, bad and stupid things are NOT a natural instinct of ours... more of an excuse to encourage the wrong doers is all. A good example would be another civilization different from america in which ethics is relatively higher (and im saying that unbiasedly) say japan (which is actually an extreme case IMO) where cheaters ratio is considerable a lot less thus less enviromental influence on ppl and spreading the ideaology that.... according to ur saying Doctor "Most ppl do it". How many japaneese do u find making mistakes and blame it on the fact that they r only human? how many of them are even familiar with that term at all? For a fact, it's not a group of my friends in there for sure as they laughed -hard 0.0"- when i was ranting about that term u repeatedly used "....we're only human". i hope my point is getting clearer, it's just like saying the devil made me do it or whatever the hell makes ya feel better about a mistake that while not as horrible as killin, u should be responsible about it.
my feelins r gettin out of hand here....
i mean if a girl who has a boy love her since he was a kid and tells him she shares his same feeling, WHY THE HECK WOULD SHE GO N HAVE SEX W/SOMEONE, ANYONE ELSE? OR SHOULD I ASK HOW COULD SHE? HELL MIGHT AS WELL INVITE HER HEARTBROKEN GUY TO WATCH SINCE WE'RE ONLY HUMAN AN NONE OF US IS PERFECT AN ALL.....

*mellows down* o.o
wow! that felt GREAT to say!

now, bout forgiving themselves n all that, before readin this part note that while seemingly radically different, it's my own inexperienced oppinion with no facts involved seeing as i've never been a cheater in my life:
i think the right feeling should be the burn that ignites within u whenever u're temped or confused while balancing out whether u should go back to ur old ways or not. a burning that pains u inside n clears ur mind immediately of ANY doubts about how horribly u could damage ur other significant one. no need to make it a drama soap opera or japanime show by "forgivin urself or not", actually u could NOT forgive urself, but in a healthy way such that it serves u as a warning line that u should never cross, i peel the term to make as simple as that.

Now from paragraph 3 til the end;
anger-inducing? i dont know, makes me feel like useless if i dont get angry -not that its my best quality :o- about 1 on cheating on another, so how do u think ill act if I get cheated on? to be honest i wouldnt know, maybe i'll be tempted to break someone or maybe ill break down n cry.....
in WHATEVER the case, my anger will not blindfold me from any facts or rational thinking.i mean u wont find me bithchin n sayin, yeh she cheated on me just to hurt me! so nah im not gonna be havin blind-hating ravings.... i know that much! n ill admit it, ur standards to how OK is it to cheat are really different than mine Doctor.N in my stupid opinion, i blame ur enviroment (~ country's cheating ppl ratio, the endless shows including cheating love affairs etc.) that it has affected ur judgement n detoriated it from what i consider (and i speak here only on my own behalf) a good persepective bout cheating -according to my own enviroment and influences in my turn-.
i dont know, i dont seem to be makin a lot of sense or havin a point in this paragraph so ill end it here!

Spec Highwind
05-26-2008, 02:49 PM
Claps to Leon. Seriously.

I can find a big difference in European and American mentality, that's normal, we're really different.

Doctor
05-27-2008, 02:03 AM
I stand corrected.

Phoenix Flame
05-27-2008, 07:42 AM
Someday, I'd love to sit down and disect the excuses I gave myself to cheat...the reasons I told myself that I was justified. I think that part of that voice was programming/the culture/etc., but the other part was something dark, malevolent, sollen and basted in isolation and cooked in anger. Everyone has their own excuses/reasons for cheating, but that doesn't give the individual any right to hurt their significant other like that. As far as forgiving themselves...I think that that's really up to the individual. It took me a while to accept what happened and seek forgiveness. I think you can really only find that in humility. I can identify with the ignorance of my surrounding culture, but I think Leon's right. When the day ends, we all have to own-up to what we did with that day. And while cheating may be less on the scale of a game of 'who's the biggest loser,' the potential and realized consequences aren't worth a few fleeting moments of enjoyment. When its staring you in the face and its your emotions on the line - the decision might not look as befitting as to what's going on in your heart and how you feel...but you should always take the other person's feelings into consideration. How would YOU feel if they did this to you? Honestly?



This is just a side note: watch the language from now on...that goes for everyone. Anger doesn't excuse breaking rules either y'know. ;p

Leon
05-29-2008, 08:06 AM
hmmm i wonder what doctor said before phoenix edited that? :p (yeh, i fixed mypost too)
probably was a bit upset bout my swearin, anyway, sry doc, when u get to know me well enough like the others here u'll know that if there's a thorn in my side i take it out even if i have to cut my self open. so yeh, im sometimes incontrolable with the stuff i say, n everyone's experienced it.... it was just ur turn! :D

so language behaviour, right!

Now, to phoenix's post!
well ASIDE from influences an all that, i'll use doctor's words to describe this, i despair from someone who cheats while believing whatever reason he has is worth it, n phoenix said it best:
the potential and realized consequences aren't worth a few fleeting moments of enjoyment.

i mean it's like one of 2 cases:
1- U either DONT cheat on ur other one 2- U break up, n b free to do whatever u want
i just cant see anything in between that shouldnt lead to one of the 2 situations!

ur post cheered me up btw! not because u think im right, but because u considered my oppinion open mindedly while it was concerning ur own country. who knows, i might b wrong, but the fact that u're considering all possibilities feels just right :p

Phoenix Flame
05-29-2008, 12:49 PM
Actually...she just unneccessarily quoted you...that HUGE quote was just there...and then her changing her mind...so I took out the quote. ^^ Her reply is the same now as it was prior to me editing it...much as yours was SIMILAR...but different. =3

froggboy604
06-01-2008, 10:36 PM
No since cheating hurts feelings. People should try to be honest and say "I like someone else more then you. Lets break up because this wouldn't work out" instead of being dishonest.

Phoenix Flame
06-02-2008, 06:25 AM
...or even: 'I'm sorry, but I've met someone that I want to get to know a little more and see where it leads. I don't want to hurt your feelings, so I'm being honest with you and I hope you respect that....blah blah blah' ...or something similar.